Thrown From A Horse - Gravity Lessons

Horses have good days.  And they have bad days.  Some days they put their head down low and walk straight along the trail.  Other days they're pretty sure there's a mountain lion behind every brush pile.

My daughter and I went for a long trail ride yesterday.  The time change from Daylight Savings to Standard has eliminated the possibilities of weekday rides for me.  There's just no light left when I get home.  So, weekends are the only time available.  Because I so love to ride, the weather isn't much of a factor.  The temps topped out only in the high 30's yesterday but the sun was shining and I had to ride.  I didn't want to work the horses in the pasture and round pen.  I wanted to ride.

I was riding Belle.  She is a 3 year-old Mustang that had a great start under saddle by her previous owner/trainer.  Most people would call her "green broke".  I've done a lot of work with her to desensitize her to "spooky" things.  We've made great progress with mail boxes, trash cans, clumps of bushes, ponds and even chainsaws.  However, the fact that I'm the only one in the family that actually wants to ride her should say something.

Yesterday was just a "bad hair day" for Belle.  As soon as we got out of the pasture she was jumpy.  Head up, ears dancing, looking back and forth, stopping to look around.  I did some calming maneuvers, neck bends, circles etc.  They would have their effect for a few minutes and then wear off.

About half way through the ride we started to have some real spooks.  We came out of some trees and something (a stand of cattails maybe) spooked her enough to jump a bit sideways.  Then it was a fence post, then a dog, then she squealed and struck at a gelding across a fence.  (that's when my daughter apologized to the gelding for Belle's bad hair day.)  At that point I had had enough.  The growing feeling that this whole ride was going to end with me on the ground (without my written consent) was rising.  So I got off and starting walking her.

After 10 minutes or so, she really seemed to have calmed down.  Because she is so young and because I have done so much training with her, she really does look to me for leadership.  When I'm walking in front of her, she is often much more relaxed.

So anyway, we came to large and beautiful vacent lot that we decided to cut across to head back home.  I figured that Belle was ready to ride again so I climbed back on.  The 5 acre lot had a few small ponderosa pine and plenty of tall grass, neither of which have ever been a problem for Belle.  I was relaxed and feeling better about the ride.

That is, until we spooked a rabbit up out of the grass about 15 feet away.  Belle instantly jumped to the right about 10 feet in the most instantaneous spook I've ever experienced.  The nice ride turned into slow motion.  It was a lot like the old cartoons where Wiley coyote runs off a cliff while chasing Road Runner.  He stops in mid air, cautiously puts his foot down, realizes what's happened and suddenly plummets to earth thousands of feet below.  Imagine me, stopped rather sideways in the air, feeling around beneath my bum for a horse, realizing there's no horse there, and then dropping the 4 feet to the ground.

I got up, unhurt.  Belle was standing there acting a bit apologetic.  And my daughter was trying to choke down a laugh.  She welcomed me to the "Thrown Club". I climbed back on and we rode home - completely uneventful with Belle putting her head down like an old trail horse and plodding along.

I learned something about horses and people yesterday.  When it comes to horses, I realized that if they are having a spooky day, you either 1) need to go back to the pasture and work them from the ground, or 2) expect one or more flying dismounts on your ride.

When it comes to people, I was reminded that they too are just as predictable.  People give off evidence of how they are going to treat you.  Evidence of "agendas", doing little manipulative things, a little more criticism than normal, addictions and all the cover-ups that go with them - these are all things that tell you that your "ride" with this person could end you up unexpectedly on the ground.

With people, the options  basically follow the same idea as do the solutions for spooky horses.  If you choose to just keep riding along with those people, ignoring the signs that can't be ignored, you will get thrown - and you will get hurt.

But so many of us forget that there really IS another option:  send those people out of your life into their own pasture where they can kick and buck and spook without you.  I didn't have to keep riding Belle yesterday.  And for many of us, it's a new and growing realization that we don't have to put up with the unsettledness of people around us.

Sending them out to their own pasture is really simple.  You just call them on their issues.  You point it out to them.  You tell them that you don't want it anymore and you're not going to take it anymore.  You set some boundaries.  You quit the ride of life with them.  Dismount.  And like with horses, it doesn't have to be done in an angry, defensive way.  It's a simple, quiet boundary that says, "I'm not going to get hurt today and will take the steps necessary to prevent it."  Often, just pointing their stuff out to them will make them realize that you've blown their cover and they will decide that they'd better move on or everyone's going realize how they treat people.


With them in their own pasture, working out their own issues, facing the natural consequences of life on their own, you will enjoy a much more quiet trail ride for your own life.

If you're hanging on for dear life in some wild ride that someone else is causing, I encourage you to get off.  Just stop.  Make your own decision for how your trail ride is going to go today.  God will give you the strength.  And you will love the peace.